Umbrella Boy
by Sarsaparilla
Summary: Umbrellas. Sasuke didn't own one. To his own knowledge, he had never owned one. Trust Them to get their hands on this piece of information. SasuNaru


**I DO NOT OWN NARUTO, Masashi Kishimoto does.**

**Sasu/Naru (slash) **

This isn't really much of anything. Just kinda wrote it on a whim. Reviews would be nice.

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Umbrella Boy 

It was still raining. Now, normally Sasuke didn't pay much attention to the rain. If it came pouring down during a mission, it was a means of toughening up, it was a part of life, and it was something a person just dealt with. Why complain about something that just _is?_ But, today, it was more than a rain shower; it was a spring rain. Over the years, spring, in Konoha, had become a dangerous time for the Uchiha, and he could blame nearly all of this on puberty and its damned hormones.

Every spring, Sasuke became increasingly paranoid - not that it wasn't well-warranted, of course, just a tad uncharacteristic - and it was all caused by a drastic increase in fangirl activity. During his days as a genin, he'd been reluctant to pin the title 'fangirl' on anyone. After all, while confidence is important, nay, necessary in the life of a shinobi, arrogance _did_ tend to be man's most common tragic flaw. As they'd grown older, however, and moved up into the ranks of chunin, perspectives had changed and all that good, clean (clean?) Sasuke-adoration had just become ridiculous.

Early March to early June, Konohagakure's young women began acting less and less like strong kunoichi, good citizens, and respectable human beings, and more and more like animals in heat. The dark-haired sixteen year-old had seen his share of stampedes triggered by this very same animalistic, instinctual fangirlism. It was during times like these that he was very glad for his learned ninja skills.

Maybe a week ago, things had done the impossible and gotten worse.

Umbrellas. Sasuke didn't own one. To his own knowledge, he had _never_ owned one. Trust _Them_ to get their hands on this piece of information. On a rainy Sunday, the boy had gone through his regular morning routine before leaving his house undaunted. So what if it rained? _Real ninjas_ weren't put off by a little water. Hell, they weren't put off by a whole lot of water! This was probably the reason that most didn't own umbrellas, or ponchos, or even big rubber boots. Rain hats weren't ever discussed.

Perhaps no one had told the girls.

For _Them_, a cloudy day was an excuse for a cute, brand-new rain outfit. If they ever happened to experience a monsoon in Fire country, Uchiha Sasuke expected the clothing stores to be the first buildings flooded.

Only a calm, cool, drizzly Sunday morning could have brought on something as terrifying as a hoard of _Them_.

"Sasuke-kun, _where's your umbrella?"_

_"Sasuke-kun doesn't have an umbrella?"_

"You can use my umbrella, Sasuke-kun!"

"SHARE AN UMBRELLA WITH ME!"

And then _They_ were everywhere. Usually, he was able to escape easily, without a scratch. He did manage to escape this time, no scratches to speak of, but not without being poked at least twice in the same eye by the end of an umbrella rib.

As soon as he was out, he was running.

"But, Sasuke-kun, _your_ _hair!_"

"You'll get wet, Sasuke-kuuun!"

He ran faster, but then, unexpectedly, slowed down 'til he was almost within _Their_ reach. At the last minute, he found himself ducking into Ichiraku and out of the rain. He caught sight of his fearsome pursuers slowing down, surrounding the ramen store nonchalantly, positioning themselves at different points down the street. Just what Sasuke had expected. He was trapped, but he was safe.

In order to confirm his suspicions, he took a cautious step out from under the awning, retreating immediately when he was assailed with what seemed like hundreds of umbrellas.

At first, waiting for the rain to pass seemed like his best, his _only,_ option. But one minute grew to fifteen, and then thirty. And _They_ were still there. In fact, he waited patiently until lunchtime, Ichiraku customers coming and going, and Sasuke was almost overpowered by the scent of ramen. He was almost so distracted by the fangirls that he missed Naruto's arrival. Of course, no one could manage to be totally oblivious to the boy in orange.

"Hey, Sasuke!" the blond cheered, obviously completely missing the overpowering aura of fear that surrounded the shop.

Sasuke grunted. He couldn't let himself be distracted from his business of mentally mapping out the position of every enemy with his eyes. He couldn't spare a glance towards a wet, attractive teammate who wielded an umbrella, and-

Umbrella!

Gasping, the Uchiha threw his body backwards to put more space between himself and the menacing gamp. He barely noticed his own tripping over a stool as he struggled to get away from the evil thing, but, once he'd made it on to the ground, his heart rate slowed. It was only Naruto. Naruto with a terrible, terrible lime-coloured umbrella, but Naruto all the same. As far as he knew, the young man in front of him was not one of the scarring, very male fan_boys _of The Uchiha Sasuke Fanclub (the Konoha branch). Thank goodness for that.

But did he really mean that? Sasuke took another look at the beautiful chunin. Puberty had done great things for him, though it wasn't like Naruto hadn't been gifted with remarkable colouring and facial structure right off the bat. Since he'd noticed these things since their genin days, it was difficult for him to discern when exactly admiration had turned into attraction.

A submissive, umbrella-wielding fanboy Naruto was starting to sound really good. So good, in fact, that he had to turn away from the shinobi so he could remind himself that, A) he was in public, and B) Naruto was a part of said public. Oh, and the ever-useful C) sexual acts gone public were very often frowned upon.

He hated being in public. Really hated it, but he was stuck there now.

The dark-haired shinobi sat down angrily on the nearest stool where Naruto appeared just a moment later, plopping down on the one next to it. The boy grinned slyly.

"So, Sasuke, decided to finally admit your secret love?"

Sasuke stared back, eyes wide. How did he know? He had been so painfully inconspicuous! "Wh-what are you talking about, Dobe?"

Naruto cocked his head and rolled his eyes. "Your secret love for ramen! Duh! What did you think I was talking about?"

"Che. I hate ramen."

"Then what are you doing here, stupid? This _is_ Ichiraku Ramen!" The blond stared at him, seeming genuinely puzzled, before coming to some sort of conclusion. "_I_ know why you're here! You came to see me, didn't you? Didn't you? I _knew _it! If you want to see me, Sasuke-_kun,_ all you have to do is ask," he drawled flirtatiously, ending with a wink.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, knowing for a fact that flirting had become his friend's latest game, and turned his eyes back to the street.

"I'm here, you moron, because I'm trapped."

Naruto followed his gaze, laughing when he figured it out. "Imagine that - Uchiha Sasuke, ninja extrodinaire, trapped by a bunch of girls!"

Both boys stiffened when a particularly perceptive young woman caught the remark and glared daggers in Naruto's direction. When several others joined in, the boy's laugh became nervous. "Huh. Figures that that'll be the way you go. Suffocated by girls," he said bitterly.

But Sasuke didn't _want _to be suffocated by girls!

"So how're you gettin' outta here?"

Good question. And he really did have to get out of there. Not only did he want to avoid an untimely death, but, after all this time spent listening to the pitter-patter of the rain, he was really starting to need a washroom.

"I mean, they're all _over_ the place! What set 'em off this time?"

"Umbrellas."

Naruto's blue eyes were surprised and confused, but Sasuke couldn't blame him for it. "What about the damn umbrellas?"

Sasuke threw is arms around a bit, looking a little lost and very near the end of his rope. "I don't have one!" He pointed at his companion's green umbrella, repeating, "I don't have one!"

There was this slightly awkward silence during which Teuchi, Ichiraku's owner, moved to the other end of the counter.

Then Sasuke broke it. "But..."

Cue the light bulb!

"You do."

"Huh?"

In response, the Uchiha simply grabbed one tan hand and pulled the boy off of his stool, dragging towards the street. Immediately, the girls tensed, and Naruto started to really resist. "No way! If you're going down, I'm not letting you take me with you! Get _off,_ Sasuke-bastard!"

"Dobe! Stop moving!" He lowered himself to an ear surrounded in blond hair, and whispered, "I have a plan." It's difficult to say whether it was the words or Sasuke's hot breath that shut the chunin up, but he did stop struggling.

"Now, listen very carefully. I need you to open your umbrella."

Naruto did as he was told, eyes wary.

"And get over here; we're going to need to share it."

"Listen, bastard, you should have brought your own da-"

"Look at those girls, Naruto. See the way they're looking at you? You're already their next target."

The hoard of fangirls ruffled their raincoats, agitated and impatient. The blond boy shot a glare towards his friend before shuffling over to his side. "This is so your fault."

Sasuke's only response was to quickly wrap an arm around the other's waist, pull him suddenly very close, and throw them both out on to the street underneath the lime-coloured umbrella. Then they ran, but, surprisingly, no one gave chase. The Uchiha had an umbrella, didn't need theirs, and was already halfway back to the mansion. Fire did, however, erupt in the eyes of every young woman, the boys' close proximity cause for serious concern (and intense rage).

Naruto was one who couldn't find the strength to struggle or complain; sure, his life had been gambled, but he hadn't realized how cold he'd been, and Sasuke was surprisingly...warm. It was nice.

Nice enough to guarantee the dark-haired shinobi silence and considerably more comfort. As the blond snuggled slightly into him, Sasuke let out a content sigh, and leaned down to whisper mischievously into that beautiful ear for a second time that day.

"We're sharing an umbrella from now on."


End file.
